25 Things That Are Stealing Your Mom Joy


25 Things That Are Stealing Your Mom Joy

25 Things That Are Stealing Your Mom Joy

This is my comeback year. If you can call it a comeback. Really, it’s me getting my Mom groove back. I no longer can be the dog-tired, stretched far too thin, grouchy, impatient, irritable and unhappy Mom I was last year.

 

I don’t think anyone wants that unhappy grouch back.

 

Believe me, I never thought this would be me. I never thought I would be such an unhappy Mom.

 

The first few years of parenthood were blissful. I fondly look at pictures and remember the moments with pure love – though, we still had tantrums and some nights I was racked with Mom guilt – I still adored the first few years.

 

I loved being with my kids so much so that after I put them to bed, I would miss them. When they started cooing in the morning, I’d jump out of bed and run into their room to swoop in and pick them up.

 

But I stopped feeling like that…

 

I started pretending to be sleeping even as the kids poked me through the covers. Or I’d snap “Mommy is still sleeping!” and bury my head under my pillow hoping they’d go away.

 

One time I even grabbed my pillow, snatched the comforter off the bed and locked myself in the closet for five more minutes of sleep.

 

The kids started going to my husband’s side of the bed instead of mine. They brought him toys and showered him with foot tickles and elaborate imaginative stories.

 

I noticed the change and at first, I was hurt. But really, I couldn’t blame them.

 

When their Dad greeted them with warmth and sincere happiness at seeing them first thing in the morning, the alternative was the ice queenWho would you choose? 

 

I was a grouch. A sleep-deprived, short-fused mom no one liked. Least of all, me.

 

I am grateful to Stay at Home with my kids but for the past several months, the change to my energy and attitude has been on a steady decline.

 

And if I’m being completely honest, recently it turned into a nosedive.

 

My capacity for patience, to handle sleep deprivation, dealing with the constant noise and taking care of kids that only want to fight with one another… was gone.

 

I knew I needed to grab the throttle and make changes not only for myself, but for my family. I couldn’t stand the sound of my snapping, barking voice as the kids made breakfast requests or the way I looked in the mirror with my mouth drawn into a tight line when my daughter squirmed as I brushed her hair.

 

I didn’t like the person I had become.

 

During my tailspin, I didn’t have any self-care practices, and admittedly wasted the time I had alone while the kids slept. My gas tank was empty.

 

I can look back now and say that I said Yes to too many things I didn’t want to do, but felt obligated to.

 

It created a fermenting environment that soured my body, mind and spirit. The sad reality is that my children, family requests, friends, our home, and even our dog’s needs all took priority over my own.

 

The snowball effect of a year worth of sleep deprivation, overworking and unhealthy habits made me an awfully tired, irritable and cantankerous Mom my kids didn’t like. And I didn’t like either.

 

 

Who Needs Self-Care Practices?

 

The phrase, self-care is plastered all over social media and the internet. I’ve always avoided clicking on the articles because I didn’t think I had the time to create my own self-care practices and didn’t want to feel guilty reading an article with fact after fact why it was essential.

 

And then one day, I clicked on an article with suggestions for simple five-minute self-care practices because that was about the only amount of time I could spare in my busy schedule. In fact, the article was the rude wake-up call I  needed to decide right then and there, I needed to make changes.

 

Wide, sweeping changes.

 

The truth is, I cannot be the Mom my kids want and need, and the person I want to be for them, unless I take care of myself. And since I didn’t – and no one else – liked the person I was, it was time to be a better person.

 

25 Things That are Stealing The Joy Out of Motherhood
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How Did This Happen?

 

You don’t lose yourself overnight, you lose yourself with every “no” you put out in the universe. Every excuse, every white lie, every denial.

 

No, I don’t feel like working out today.

 

No, I’m too tired to go out with friends.

 

No, I don’t have time to relax because I have so much to do.

 

No, I would love to get a pedicure but I just can’t swing it.

 

No, no, no…

 

I see it happen time and time again… when something tragic happens to a parent or child in the news, or worse to a friend, it gives us a renewed sense of our priorities.

 

It’s awful that it takes a catalyst of such magnitude to redirect our attention to the real priorities, but it does.

 

What is important in my life isn’t the extra stuff I feel obligated to volunteer for, or the work assignment I’m too busy to take on but still say yes to… it’s my children and my husband.

 

Those four people are my entire world. Taking care of them and building a healthy and happy environment for our family is, and always will be my main priority.

 

However, I can’t take care of them when I’m operating at 20 percent.

 

This is why creating self-care practices and learning to make time for the things I love, are important.

 

When I finally sat down to write down everything I wanted to eliminate or change to create less chaos, more happiness and contentment in my life and for my family, the list was pretty long.

 

It turns out, I had made a mess of living a joyless life this past year.

 

So, one by one, I stared working through the list and making changes to live more joyously as a woman, a wife and a Mom.

 

Saying “No” began to feel good and powerful. Saying “Yes” to my family felt even better.

 

Slowly, the changes have given me a renewed sense of what’s important in my life and I’m becoming a happier, more patient and loving person each day.

 

I’m becoming the old me.

 

If you’re a tired, overworked, “Yes Mom,” or in a Mom funk with feelings of being burnt out, you should make a top 5 list of the areas that you can make changes and start your Rejuvenated Mom Journey with me today.

 

25 Things That are Stealing The Joy Out of Motherhood
Copyright 123rf.com

 

25 Things That Could be Stealing the Joy in Your Motherhood

 

  1. Multitasking
  2. You Don’t Have ay Self-Care Practices
  3. Saying Yes When You Want (and should) Say No
  4. Overeating
  5. Not Resting / Taking an Afternoon Power Nap (or just sleeping when the kids sleep!)
  6. Lack of Exercise and Daily Activity
  7. Negative Self-Talk
  8. Sleep Deprivation
  9. TV Binging
  10. Unhealthy Eating Habits and Too Much Processed Food / Sweets
  11. Social Media Binging
  12. Aiming for Perfectionism
  13. Checking Email Every Time Your Phone Pings
  14. Going to Bed Too Late
  15. Overscheduling Yourself & Your Family
  16. Not Scheduling Time for Yourself
  17. Rushing Through Things Joylessly to “Just Get Them Done”
  18. You Don’t Practice Gratitude
  19. Worrying About Things You Cannot Control
  20. Trying to Always Have a Clean House
  21. Drinking Too Much Caffeine
  22. You Don’t Ask for Help
  23. Not Having Adult Conversations (of the Non-Parenting Topic Kind)
  24. You’re Isolated from Friends and Feel Lonely
  25. Not Taking Enough Kid-Free Time to Reenergize Yourself

 

Where are you going to start your journey? It’s time to be a happy Mom again – you and your children deserve it!

 

Want More? 

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Welcome!

I’m Corinne, a Mom to three active little kids, including twins. I love coffee at any time of the day, believe afternoon naps are essential, am working hard at creating a meditation practice and filing our family life with experiences, not things.
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