Encouraging Independent Play because you don’t have to entertain your kids, and the steps to encourage independent play time. How to use daily routine cards and keeping a stash of activities on rotation.
Kids Need Independent Play Time: The Benefits to Encouraging Independent Play Time
It must be the time of year, but at dinner with girlfriends the other night, there was a common theme that kept coming up in our conversations. The topic? Getting kids to play independently.
These are the things I heard my friends say:
- How am I supposed to entertain my kids every single day! Any ideas?
- I work from home, but my kids are also home right now. How do I make sure they aren’t just planted in front of the TV?
- I’m already out of activities. What do you have for me?
- Send wine. Send a babysitter. Send help! (I had a good laugh at this one because right now, I feel like this too!)
Here are my tricks for pulling together activities on the fly, encouraging independent play, and letting imaginations soar. Especially when you need to get things done and NEED your kids to play on their own.
Getting kids to play independently and having a full tank of patience so you don’t yell are things that go hand-in-hand.
If You Need a Screen-Free Activities your Kids will LOVE…
How to Get Kids to Play Alone
I love Summer too and I do my best to make this time of year memorable for my kids, but I still have to get things done around the house and deadlines to meet.
(This also happens during school breaks and time of year when holidays happen.)
When kids play alone and without agendas, they get to be creative and imaginative. This is where their imaginations flourish!
1. Stick to a Routine Where Independent Playtime / Quiet Time Happens Every Day
I know, I know, you’ve heard me talk about our routine only a bazillion times but that’s because it’s the glue that holds together our days. Literally, I would be lost without it.
With a routine we all know what happens during the day, there’s time for chores, reading, getting outside, making meals and even nap time since my youngest still naps (thank you, Lord!)
If you use any of my routines whether it’s one of the 40+ sample schedules from Mastering Sleep & Schedules or your own, you’ll notice one thing should be in every daily routine – independent play time / quiet time.
These are the golden nuggets when you need to get work done, clean the house, and take time for yourself.
If you’re just introducing routines or need to get yours back on track during this crazy time, using printable picture routine cards has been a lifesaver for us the last five years. Especially since my 5-year-old gets easily distracted, routine cards remind her what comes next and she’s not lallygagging around.
When you have independent play as a part of your daily routine, children expect to play on their own and know you’ll be back to play with them after a little quiet time.
2. Keep a Secret Stash of Activities Only for Independent Play Times
I admit, I feel a tinge of pressure to entertain my kids all the time so they aren’t on screens. Do they have arts & craft materials? What games can they play? What can they do outside? Should we go for a bike ride together? Should I set up a slip and slide or sprinklers or fill buckets of water balloons or water for squirt guns?
But, I also need to work, and clean the house and walk the dogs and pay our mortgage and feed my ravenous family…. so that’s kind of hard to do both.
The good news?
Kids can (and should) entertain themselves.
This is when they’re the most creative and inventive when left to their own devices to “figure it out” and deal with times of boredom.
I like to keep a stash of activities for times like these
It feels good to be prepared and have a plan, right?
The trick though, is to only pull these ideas once in a while, or the excitement of them will wear off. That’s why they’re in my secret stash for EASY activities all my kids LOVE!
3. Declare a Movie, Pajama, Fort-Building Day for Creativity & Solo Time
Two of my three kids woke up in a fowl mood the other morning and as soon as I saw their faces, I could see how exhausted they were.
(Thanks Dad for thinking it’d be a good idea to wrestle and rile them before bedtime so they couldn’t fall asleep!)
That’s why I declared a pajama, movie and blanket fort-building day.
We don’t do screen time every day in our house, so when the kids get a chance to bring all their blankets, stuffies and pillows downstairs to watch a movie, they think it’s an extra special day. But I know better. It’s a strategic play to help my crabby kids rest their bodies, and for me to rest or get stuff done as well!
It’s not an every-day kind of strategy, but works well for an occasional lazy day inside.
4. Let Them Build & Get Messy
What do kids love the most? Messes. Dirt. Mud. Building. Creating.
Here are some ideas you can leave them to:
- Make mud pies, play in the dirt, and dig up dinosaur bones 🙂
- Sandbox (or put sand in a clear bin and let them play!)
- Water tables or bins
- Water – sprinklers, slip and slide, squirt guns, water balloons, (no pool if unsupervised, of course)
- Water boat races
- If your kids are old enough and responsible enough, let them try to build with hammer, glue, nails and wood a lemonade stand, or bird house.
5. Fill Love Buckets with Family Time First so Independent Activities Aren’t So Hard
You know what kids crave the most above all else?
Not toys. Not ice cream. Not staying up late.
Connection with their parents, believe it or not. (yes, even your teenager, I promise.)
They want to feel loved and know they are lovable.
So, while we spend a lot of time together doing things, I also make time for family fun together like any of these 40 family fun night ideas, playing board games, UNO, coloring pages (I keep a pile with markers on a desk), or an impromptu water balloon fight.
Afterwards, I know we’ve filled their proverbial attention bucket and my own, and they’re good to go for an hour of playing solo without needing attention.
6. Be Flexible & Get Out of the House When You Need It Most!
Some people think having a routine makes your days too structured or stiff, but getting out of the house is a part of our daily schedule and sometimes this has to be spontaneous.
When noise is peaking at our house, or tempers are starting to run hot, this is when I know it’s time to get out of the house.
We’ll take a walk, go on a bike ride, drive to a stream or lake to play in the water for an hour, and restore everyone’s internal balance with a diversion and some fresh air.
You can move your routine around and swap activities if your kids don’t need to be straight down for a nap. Your routine is always as flexible as you need, but as long as you stick with sleep times, you’ll be fine.
I hope these ideas help you get some work, or laundry, or a 15-minute power nap in while your kids are content and happy playing on their own.
More Helpful Resources:
I hope these ideas help you get some work, or laundry, or a 15-minute power nap in while your kids are content and happy playing on their own.
More Info to Encourage Independence & Solo Play Time
- Sample Summer Schedules for Kids (& Smoother Days Ahead!)
- Daily Routine Cards for kids
- 50 Screen-Free Activities for Kids This Summer
- Free Printable: Summer Schedule for Kids Planner Set
- Creating Screentime Rules for Summer (Free Printable)
- 50 Activities & Experiments to Keep Kids Learning in Summer
