• PARENTING
    • POSITIVE PARENTING
    • CHILD SAFETY
    • HEALTHY KIDS
    • ACTIVITIES & BIRTHDAY
    • SCHOOL
  • SLEEP & ROUTINES
  • BIG EMOTIONS
  • HOLIDAYS
    • GIFT GUIDES
    • CHRISTMAS
    • HALLOWEEN
  • MOM LIFE
    • AROUND THE HOUSE
    • NON-TOXIC LIVING
    • BABY & MOM FREEBIES
↑
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Parenting Tools

The Pragmatic Parent

Positive Parenting for Better Connection, Less Chaos & More Family Happiness

  • PARENTING
    • POSITIVE PARENTING
    • CHILD SAFETY
    • HEALTHY KIDS
    • ACTIVITIES & BIRTHDAY
    • SCHOOL
  • SLEEP & ROUTINES
  • BIG EMOTIONS
  • HOLIDAYS
    • GIFT GUIDES
    • CHRISTMAS
    • HALLOWEEN
  • MOM LIFE
    • AROUND THE HOUSE
    • NON-TOXIC LIVING
    • BABY & MOM FREEBIES

Why Every Family Needs a Safe Word

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Pinterest
  • Email

I don’t worry about my children being abducted when they’re playing in our front yard like I do the possibility of abuse they may encounter at some point in their childhood.

 

The chances of my children being kidnapped are very unlikely compared to statistics that say 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 7 boys will be the victim of a form of abuse before the age of 18 while the unlikely chance of abduction is 1 in 300,000.

 

Child abuse in 90% of cases is perpetrated by someone known to the family. It could be a family member, relative, friend, friend’s sibling, teacher, coach and other close to your child. You may think this won’t happen to you, but statistically, it could and it might.

 

Why Every Family Needs a Safe Word

 

In our home, we discuss unsafe people, safety rules, body safety and unsafe situations but one of the most important tools we have is the use of a FAMILY SAFE WORD.

 

A safe word is a word only our immediate family knows – not relatives, not friends – and is not a common word that we would use in our everyday lives such as puppy, soccer or milk. It’s a word that is not commonly used although it is memorable, but if our children were to use it, it would immediately draw our attention.

 

Be sure not to pick a safe word that is difficult for children to remember. They will remember “cotton candy,” “banana split,” or “pineapple,” even as they get older, but they may not remember “blue faced parrot” or “Farmer John and his cow.”

 

Do not share your safe word with people outside of your family, even grandparents.

 

I know in our family we don’t keep secrets because they can lead to unsafe scenarios, but we tell our kids that a Safe Word isn’t a secret, it’s just a special code word only for our family to know and use in threatening situations. Unsafe people and situations are considered a threatening situation and something as parents, we want our kids to tell us about immediately.

 


The purpose of a safe word is for children to go to their parents when they are uncomfortable talking about these unsafe feelings, unsafe people, unsafe requests, unsafe touching, and unsafe situations and need immediate help.

 

A safe word gives kids a word to use, when they can’t find their own words.

 

 


 

For example, if you are at a friend’s BBQ and your child is with an adult who is making inappropriate conversations and requests of your son, your child can come to you, tell you the safe word regardless if you are alone or standing around in a group with your friends – you will know exactly what they are disclosing and can respond immediately.

 

Children can have a hard time disconcerting unsafe situations and requests, especially from people they believe they can trust such as relatives and family friends.

 

Be sure to discuss situational role-playing so that children grasp what types of things improper and unsafe touching, talking, requests, environments and situations constitute.

 

Remember that these conversations aren’t a one-time thing.

 

Discuss the topic of body and people safety with your kids regularly so they retain and understand what is appropriate and what is unsafe, especially as they mature and their environments change based on their age such as sleepovers, overnight trips, play dates at friend’s or relatives houses and when they are away from their parents.

 

Why Every Family Needs a Safe Word

 

Be sure to discuss with your children that predators are great at manipulating children and may try to pry the safe word from them in conversation or with guessing games.

 

Under no circumstance, unless it’s the child’s parents, brother or sister should the safe word be used. If someone is trying to get you to tell them your safe word, they are a tricky person and not to be trusted and the parents should be told immediately.

 

 

Want More? 

  • What Happened to Our Daughter and Why We Created a Safe Word
  • Educating Children on Body Safety
  • Warning Signs of Physical, Sexual and Emotional Abuse
  • Safety Rules Every Child Should Know
  • Identifying a Predator and Protecting Your Kids
  • 10 Prevention Tips for Parents

 

Related

FREE PARENTING GUIDE: 8 COMMON PARENTING MISTAKES & HOW TO FIX THEM

There was an error submitting your subscription. Please try again.

Filed Under: CHILD SAFETY

Comments

  1. Larry Weaver says

    January 3, 2018 at 5:17 PM

    Thanks for the tip to create a safe word with my family that is not commonly used but memorable in a way that my children can remember. My wife and I are trying to take measures to protect our children and family better due to the condition of the neighborhood we live in. Creating a family safe word and getting a child ID kit are measures we are thinking of taking.

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Preparedness Month: What to Do In the Event of an Intruder | says:
    September 18, 2019 at 7:11 AM

    […] this incredibly sensitive topic, please have safe words in place in your home.  Choose a word that only immediate family knows – mom, dad, siblings.  […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

FREE PARENTING GUIDE: 8 COMMON PARENTING MISTAKES & FAST FIXES

There was an error submitting your subscription. Please try again.

Free Baby Products for Mom and Freebies for Baby. Stock up on awesome baby essentials and new baby products you'll need and use. These baby essentials come in a variety of patterns including baby wrap, baby sling, baby carrier, carseat canopy or carseat cover, hooded towels, nursing pillow, pregnancy pillow and more.

Positive Parenting

How to learn from your anger, fruration or want to stop yelling at your kids. What your anger is trying to tell you and how to learn from it to do better.

How to Learn From Your Anger…

Fun things to do with your leftover Halloween candy; from freezing and baking it into sweet treats, to turning it into crafts, games and science experiments. 

Healthier Candy Choices this…

Nobody wants to hear their child use negative self-talk language like, "I'm dumb," "I'm stupid," or "I'll never be any good at _____." As a parent, it breaks your heart but here are some tips to use when responding to your child's negative self-talk

How to Respond to Your…

see more >>

Big Emotions

Nobody wants to hear their child use negative self-talk language like, "I'm dumb," "I'm stupid," or "I'll never be any good at _____." As a parent, it breaks your heart but here are some tips to use when responding to your child's negative self-talk

How to Respond to Your…

Teaching feelings and helping kids express their emotions builds lifelong emotional intelligence. Get started teaching toddlers emotions and use the building blocks for older kids too!

Teaching Feelings & 6…

Unsure how to deal with back talk? Tips on how to appropriately respond instead of react and calm the most disrespectful behaviour  - and let natural consequences teach the lesson whenever possible. 

6 Steps to Handle Backtalk…

see more >>

Sleep & Routines

When do toddlers stop napping, the signs your toddler is ready to stop napping and what to do now when your toddler no longer takes a nap. 

When Do Toddlers Stop Napping…

What's the right bedtime for a 2 year old? How to figure out the perfect bedtime for your 2 year old & create a daily routine for better sleep and nap time.

What Time Should a 2 Year Old…

If you're having trouble getting your toddler to fall asleep & stay asleep, try this smart toddler bedtime routine they won't fight, but will actually love.

A Smart (and Easy) Bedtime…

see more >>

Raising children can feel overwhelming. Let me help!

CHECK OUT MY FREE EMAIL COURSES

Could you use a little extra help?

HERE YOU'LL FIND THE MOST POPULAR PARENTING RESOURCES

Stop Yelling Handbook & Parenting Guide

$10.00

Kid's Calm Down Ideas Picture Card Set

$6.00

Name Your Emotions Picture Card Set

$6.00

WHAT'S TRENDING...

When do toddlers stop napping, the signs your toddler is ready to stop napping and what to do now when your toddler no longer takes a nap. 

When Do Toddlers Stop Napping & What To Do Now

Helpful hacks to make camping with kids a fun experience! Taking your kids camping can be both a challenge and a great time, but with these tips we'll ensure camping with kids is a stress-free adventure. Get all the details on how to prepare & tips once you're on site, plus camping ideas for families.

Genius Hacks to Make Camping with Kids Fun & Stress-Free

5 Instant ways to stop being overwhelmed by motherhood and halt the stress spiral. Specific steps to take when you feel overwhelmed by motherhood.

Instant Ways to Stop Being Overwhelmed by Motherhood

How to peacefully defuse and calm tantrums using empathy and teaching about emotions in the process. Stop tantrums by helping your child learn about emotions, name feelings, give back power and calmly handle emotional behavior.

Peacefully Calm Tantrums Using Empathy

RECEIVE THE WEEKLY PARENTING TIP

Join Over 35,000 Other Parents & Readers who Receive the Weekly Practical Parenting Tip & Occassional Freebie

There was an error submitting your subscription. Please try again.

  • HOME
  • ABOUT
  • CONTACT
  • SHOP
  • DISCLOSURE
  • TERMS OF USE
Copyright ©2019, The Pragmatic Parent. All Rights Reserved.
Design by Pixel Me Designs