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Unhappy Mom? Reclaim the Joy of Motherhood by Changing These Habits

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Why are you an Unhappy Mom? 27 habits to change and start reclaiming the joy of motherhood you’ve lost. Stop being an unhappy mom & be a happy mom again.. But if you’re a yeller and want to change, the Stop Yelling Handbook will be your first line of defense. 

25 Things That are Stealing The Joy Out of Motherhood

Reclaiming Your Joy in Motherhood

This is my comeback year. If you can call it a comeback.

Really, it’s me getting my Mom groove back.

I’m on a journey to be a happier parent, and to reclaim the joy of motherhood I lost in the jumble of stress, of obligations and trying to keep too many balls in the air last year.

I spent too long being bone tired, emotionally worn out, impatient and irritable.

Last year I was a person I didn’t even recognize, or like.

Believe me, I never thought this would be me. I never thought I would be an unhappy Mom.

The first few years of parenthood were blissful.

I fondly look at pictures and remember the moments with pure love – and although, there were still daily battles with tantrums and teething, picky eaters and nights I lay in bed racked with Mom guilt – I adored the first few years because being a Mom made me incredibly happy.

I would put my kids to bed and when they were asleep, I would ache missing them. The moment I heard them wake on the monitor, I’d jump out of bed and run into their room to swoop them up in my arms.

But I stopped feeling like that…

I started throwing the covers over my head instead of throwing them off. I’d snap “Mommy is still sleeping!” and roll the other direction like a hibernating bear.  

In time, the kids started going to my husband’s side of the bed instead of mine. If they had a nightmare in the middle of the night, they’d crawl in bed with him and not me.

They brought him toys and showered him with foot tickles in the morning.

I noticed the change and at first, I was hurt. But really, I couldn’t blame them.

When their Dad greeted them with love and sincere happiness at seeing them, the alternative was the ice queen.

Who would you choose? 

I was a grouch. A sleep-deprived, short-fused mom no one liked. Least of all, me.

I am grateful to Stay at Home with my kids but for the past several months, the change in my energy and attitude has been on a declining slope.

And if I’m being completely honest, recently it turned into a nosedive.

My capacity for patience, to handle sleep deprivation, dealing with the constant noise and ability to negotiate with my kids or redirecting them when they squabbled… was gone.

I caught myself in the mirror after I scolded my daughter for squirting an entire bottle of lotion in her hands and I didn’t recognize the person staring back at me.

She didn’t have warm eyes or a kind face, she was sharp and cold.

I knew I needed to grab the throttle and make changes not only for myself, but for my family. During my tailspin, I didn’t have any self-care practices, and admittedly wasted the time I had alone while the kids slept.

My gas tank was humming on empty for months now.

I can look back now and say that I said Yes to too many things I didn’t want to do, but felt obligated to.

The sad reality is that my children, family requests, friends, our home, and even our dog’s needs all took priority over my own.

The snowball effect of a year worth of sleep deprivation, overworking and unhealthy habits made me an bone tired, irritable, unhealthy shell of a Mom my kids didn’t like. And I didn’t like either.

 

Who Is Taking Care of Mom?

The phrase, self-care is plastered all over social media and the internet. I’ve always avoided clicking on the articles because I didn’t think I had the time to create my own self-care practices and didn’t want to feel guilty reading an article with fact after fact why it was essential.

And then one day, I clicked on an article with suggestions for simple five-minute self-care practices because that was about the only amount of time I could spare in my busy schedule. In fact, the article was the rude wake-up call I  needed to decide right then and there, I needed to make changes.

Wide, sweeping changes.

The truth is, I cannot be the Mom my kids want and need, and the person I want to be for them, unless I take care of myself.

25 Things That are Stealing The Joy Out of Motherhood

Copyright 123rf.com

 

How Did You Lose The Joy of Motherhood? 

You don’t lose yourself overnight, you lose yourself with every “no” you put out in the universe. Every excuse, every lie, every denial.

No, I don’t feel like working out today.

No, I’m too tired to go out with friends.

No, I don’t have time to relax because I have so much to do.

No, I would love to get a pedicure but I don’t have time.

No, no, no…

And then…

It happen time and time again… when something tragic happens to a parent or child in the news, or worse to a friend, it gives us a renewed sense of our priorities.

It’s awful it takes a catalyst of terrible magnitude to redirect our attention to the real priorities, but it does.

What is important in my life isn’t the extra stuff I feel obligated to do, or the work assignment I’m too busy to take on but still say yes to… it’s my family.

Those four people which make up my family are my entire world. Taking care of them and building a healthy and happy environment for us to grow together in will be my main priority.

However, I can’t take care of them when I’m operating at half full.

This is why creating self-care practices and learning to make time for the things I love, are important.

When I finally sat down to write down everything I wanted to eliminate and change in order to create less chaos and more happiness, the list was pretty long.

It turns out, I made a mess of living a joyless life this past year.

So, one by one, I stared working through the list and making changes to live more joyously as a woman, a wife and a Mom.

Saying “No” began to feel good and powerful, and not as hard.

Saying “Yes” to my family felt even better.

Slowly, the changes have given me a renewed sense of what’s important in my life and I’m becoming a happier, more patient and loving person each day.

I’m becoming the old me.

If you’re a tired, overworked, “Yes Mom,” or in a Mom funk with feelings of being burnt out, you should make a top 5 list of the areas that you can make changes and start your Rejuvenated Mom Journey with me today.

25 Things That are Stealing The Joy Out of Motherhood

 

The Steps to Help You Be a Happier Mom

Change 1 or 5 or all of these 27 things to be happier, more patient and more present in your own life. 

  1. Stop Multitasking
  2. Create Simple 5-Minutes a Day Self-Care Practices 
  3. Say No To Obligations and Requests You Don’t Want to Do or Have Time to Do 
  4. Stop Binge Eating and Overeating (especially carbs and sweets!)
  5. Rest and Take an Afternoon Nap (even if it’s a 15-minute power nap) 
  6. Aim for 30 Minutes Daily Activity
  7. Work on Having an The Organized Home so you aren’t constantly surrounded by clutter or cleaning up messes 
  8. Stop the Negative Self-Talk
  9. Get a Good Night’s Sleep
  10. No More TV Binging
  11. Cut the Processed Food and Sweets 
  12. Get Off your Phone – Stop Social Media Binging
  13. Let It Go – Don’t Always Try to Make Everything Perfect 
  14. Don’t Check Email Every Time Your Phone Pings
  15. Go to Bed at Decent Time to Get 7-8 Hours a Night 
  16. Stop Overscheduling Yourself & Your Family
  17. Schedule Time for Yourself
  18. Set Your Priorities – Don’t Just Rush Through Things Joylessly to “Just Get Them Done”
  19. Create a Gratitude Practice – Journal or Say 3 Things You’re Thankful For Every Night Before You Go to Bed
  20. Stop Worrying About Things You Cannot Control
  21. Sometimes a Messy House is OK if It Means You Keep Your Sanity
  22. Make Over Your Mornings in 14 Days 
  23. Limit Caffeine
  24. Ask for Help When You Start Feeling Overwhelmed 
  25. Have Adult Conversations (of the Non-Parenting Kind)
  26. Don’t Isolate Yourself from Friends
  27. Schedule Kid-Free Time to Reenergize Yourself

Where are you going to start your journey? It’s time to be a happy Mom again.

 

Need a little extra help to stop yelling or be a happier Mom? Here’s two FREE Courses that will help you turn things around and find more joy! 

 


 

Makeover Your Morning / Evening Routine

Juggling many hats as a busy Mom can get overwhelming.

When you wake up in the morning, or go to bed at night feeling worn down because you don’t have any time to refuel your own tank, you know it’s time for a change.

Something has to give because you can’t keep living on empty. Amiright?

I know how it feels to physically feel beat down by 5pm and without energy to make it to bedtime after a long day with my kids. To make matters worse, I’d look around to house and see a mess in the sink, hear a dryer full of clothes I still needed to fold and lunches I had to pack for the next day.

It felt like the hamster wheel was getting the best of me, and it was. I felt I was always falling behind of my responsibilities, and it was overwhelming trying to play “catch up.”

If you feel like something needs to change, and quickly, then it might be time to makeover your mornings, or makeover your evenings. I took the makeover your morning class by Say Goodbye to Survival Mode author, Crystal Paine and it transformed how I approached the day and my productivity.

If you need helping figuring out how to get all.the.things done, then either of these 14-day classes would be a huge help!

  • Makeover Your Mornings
  • Makeover Your Evenings

 

Keep Your Family Organized to Eliminate Scheduling Chaos  

If you like keeping your family’s schedules, activities and appointments on your phone, the Cozi Family Planner is the best FREE app for family organization and synch with all your family members.

Sign up to create a free account, upload all your details and download the app to your phone and you’ll see everything synched in one place. Easy, right?

 

You Might Like… 

  • 10 Highly Effective Habits of a Happy Stay at Home Mom
  • What You Should Be Doing If You Want to Raise Confident Kids
  • The Benefits of Having a Daily Routine
  • Stop Feeling Like You Have Mom Burnout
  • What are the Triggers That Cause You to Yell and Lose It With Your Kids?

Filed Under: MOM LIFE Tagged With: featured

Comments

  1. Hannah says

    March 19, 2017 at 7:50 PM

    I really enjoyed reading this. It was a really refreshing reminder and helpful breakdown on what I need to start working on in my own life.

    Just this morning, I was writing my thoughts on motherhood and how hard it can be (https://familybirdsong.blogspot.co.uk/2017/03/and-you-are-good-enough.html)

    Thank you for your wonderful words.It came at just the right time.

    Reply
  2. Jamie Fisher says

    June 8, 2017 at 5:50 PM

    Thank you for this. I am definitely in a tailspin right now. My children flinch in my presence and my husband has brought up the “D” word recently. I am ready to take action!

    Reply
    • Corinne says

      June 10, 2017 at 8:34 PM

      Oh Jamie, I’m so sorry things are so hard right now. Fight for the Mom you want to be, for the person you want to be! You can get through this. Please never hesitate to me [email protected] if you ever want to talk.

      Reply
  3. Emma S. says

    June 11, 2017 at 10:27 AM

    Thank you! I needed to read this! I’ve been spiraling down a dark hole because I’ve become the “ice queen” ever since my second one was born. I try and feel like I’m never going to get out of the hole I buried myself into. Now I’m going to work hard to be the mother I was before the truly happy mother.

    Reply
    • Corinne says

      June 12, 2017 at 10:00 PM

      Oh Emma, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this right now. I can certainly relate and it sounds like your heart is ready to make some big changes.You’ve got this, you can dig yourself out. Email me ([email protected]) if you ever want to chat about it. xo

      Reply
  4. Alexandra says

    June 15, 2017 at 9:20 AM

    I understand ans agree with EVERYTHING you are writong but reality is there is no way it can happen. I am a full time working mommy of three and as much as I would love to “not make excuses” for making ME time it just doesn’t happen. Wake up at 5…go teach all day…come home…do homework with 2/3…drive around for after school activities…cook…erc. I am lucky to get a shower in.

    Reply
  5. Cara says

    June 16, 2017 at 12:28 PM

    Omw thank you soooo much for this brilliant, well written guide to finding your mommy joy again. Im glad im not the only mommy that felt like this before.
    Thanks so much
    Xxxx

    Reply
    • Corinne says

      June 17, 2017 at 9:12 AM

      I feel like so many moms experience being unhappy but never talk about it. Glad I can be real and relatable. Being a parent is quite the ride!

      Reply
  6. Mattie says

    December 21, 2017 at 10:16 PM

    I’ve spent the last fifteen or twenty minutes reading your posts and trying to figure out where my Mom funk started and how to pull myself out of it. This article finally made it click. My mom funk started when I stopped taking time to do anything for me and was exacerbated by me telling myself “you can’t do x enjoyable thing because you haven’t done xyz necessary things and abc things that someone else asked you to do.” I know there are other factors too, but I think that’s definitely the biggest. My husband has even told me that I’ve been mean lately. He’s never used that word to describe me because it wasn’t me until recently. In all honesty, I see it too. The only “me” time I have is when I’m sleeping and heaven help the person who wakes the sleeping zazzy. Thank you for this post and your blog in general. Maybe now I can get me back.
    Now I’m off to see if I can find a post about why ten month olds get all “smacky” and “bitey.” Those Little teeth are sharp!

    Reply
  7. April says

    February 17, 2018 at 3:48 PM

    I needed this – thanks!

    Reply
  8. Elena | Latina Wife and Mom Life says

    June 12, 2018 at 8:03 AM

    I found ultimate fulfillment in my life the day shed the Mom guilt and pursued my own aspirations as well as taking self care seriously. It has had an insane impact in my role as a wife and mom. And I am now so motivated that I inspire other beautiful Women through my blog to do the same! The sense of vitality in this is beyond satisfying!

    Reply
  9. Kelley Ranaudo says

    April 9, 2019 at 2:20 PM

    Such a good read, and I can relate to every word. I ended up feeling very similar, as I came into my own overwhelmed mom stage. It took time, but small choices over time made me a happy mom again too. I love your message and helping as many moms as possible feel happier and find their joy again!

    Reply

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